::NOT for the shy, faint, easily offended, uber-religious, or extremely prude – in which case you’ve already blocked our website from your comp anyway::
What started off as a simple, innocent, hypothetical question to The Mayor, turned into a complex, in-depth, X-rated conversation that parralelled the pages of Penthouse magazine or a “Horny Twilight Virgins,” chat room … err, not that I would know lol.
But last night as I was skimming through the pages of New Moon, I was reminded of how frustrated and slightly pissed off I was with Bella for playing love ping-pong with 2 very hot, and loyal men who were both head over heels in love with her. Like damn bitch, save some fictional hotties for the rest of us will you?!
Then, I forced myself to sympathize considering the “predicament” she was in. Until I remembered how her and Jacob kissed and she gave in a little. It lead me to ask Rach:
“You think if (prior to Edward’s return of course) Bella and Jacob went to a house party together and got completely shit face, Bella would’ve let him tap?”
Quicker than a cocaine heartbeat she replied:
And I totally agree. Especially during that vulnerable stage in her life when her wounds were still fresh and just begging to be licked clean by say … A WOLF?! “Oh … Jacob … please … don’t … stop,” which 20 minute later turns into, “OH JACOB PLEASE DON’T STOP!” So on that note I asked her:
“I wonder who’s better in bed? ‘Cuz Edward STAYS hard but wouldn’t that mean Jacob could fuck you like an animal?”
We concluded Jacob. Only because Edward seems like the type who would recite poetry during sex and want to cuddle afterwards. However, Rach did factor in how good cuddling with Edward after sex would feel ‘cuz you’d get to lay your hot sweaty self against his stone cold body. To which I replied, “Yah kinda like when you flip your pillow to the cold side!” To which she replied “OMG can you imagine his cold tongue on your hot …” :X (‘cuz even I can’t finish that sentence.)
To which I replied: “I can’t even believe we’re having this conversation right now.”
So now I’m here imposing the question on yall to get more opinions and to let off some steam ‘cuz there’s nowhere at work to take a cold shower at.